I haven’t always been confident, and I didn’t even really notice that I’d gotten more confident until this kind lady pointed it out. In the past three years, my confidence has exploded. I’m sure some of it just has to do with life experience, but I can think of a few things I’ve done or realized that probably had a lot to do with the sudden change. Let me tell you about it.
This is the story of Lilacs in Paradise.
I first wanted to be a blogger when I ended up in the hospital at 17 years old. I’d been working as a care giver in a nursing home and I caught a lung infection (which is a big deal! For those of you who don’t know me, I have cystic fibrosis and with CF, a cold or lung infection can be deadly!)
In case you aren’t already familiar with the concept of resistance, I want to fill you in! Resistance is friction in life. It’s anything tough, annoying, different, uncomfortable… It’s anything that rubs you wrong or bothers you or scares you.
Here’s how to work through that.
Here are 3 pieces of short and sweet advice I have to share with baby bloggers- and what I’d go back and tell myself!
At first I resisted it SO HARD. “Don’t be a feminazi,” some rotten little voice in my head would mutter when I’d start to let my anger out. And back into the box it would go- because I wouldn’t want to be a bitch. or a feminazi. or a psychopath. or something. Right? Because I was “too much” and I needed to “chill.”
I didn’t earn my entire degree at once. I took a year-long break right in the middle… and I’m so glad I did!
This is what I what I wish someone had told me at 17 and 18 years old.
You already know you want to live a passionate life. You already want to stop being a perfectionist and learn to execute your amazing ideas, go with the flow sometimes, pave your own path at times, and have an impact on this world.
The power isn’t in hiding the feelings,
it’s in having the courage to let them show.
You’d know that if you felt the rage,
the pain, the terror
of someone forcing himself
Trusting ourselves should be the most natural thing in the world, but the truth is that it can be really difficult. Especially if we believe we’ve been wrong in the past, and even more so if our being wrong ended with pain and regret. (If this is you, take a look at this post where we talk more in-depth about releasing regret.)
I’m going to give you two tools to uncover the truth behind what’s going on. They’ll be most effective if you start with the first one to get in tune with your body and really feel where you are physically, and then dive into the second exercise to open up to the answers your heart already knows (that your self-doubt is drowning out).
Today we’re looking at recognizing resistance in our daily lives so that we can actually process it and choose our next steps consciously, rather than subconsciously sabotaging ourselves and avoiding the resistance. (Which leads to built up emotions, continued frustration, dwindling hopes, and all that other not-so-fun stuck-ness!)
You have the power to tear that belief into a million pieces and replace it with a hot new truth that empowers you, that brings you to life and embraces that powerful and inspiring woman you already ARE instead of pushing her away and denying yourself the opportunity to be her.
The releasing and the change both naturally want to happen… but sometimes we dig our heels in and raise such a fuss that we miss the entire transformation and just find ourselves in the frozen wasteland on the other side completely against our will.
Do you ever hesitate to let your partner know you’re having a difficult time?
Do you always hesitate to let your partner know?
Do you feel guilty for sharing your struggles with others?
I’m here to tell you that you are not a burden, and sharing your struggles with a loved one is not a selfish act.
The only time it is selfish is when you’re sharing to spread negativity- when you share the burden with the intent of having some company in your misery. And not just having company while you are miserable, because of course when we are hurting we long for comfort… It’s selfish to share your misery with the intention of actually creating misery in someone else’s life. That’s it. That’s when it’s selfish.
The rest of the time? Sharing your burden with another is
I’d been noticing already how much more challenging it has been lately to share my affection publicly. Vulnerability is usually something that comes easily to me… And my feelings for this wonderful man are still very much alive.
So what happened?
There's a reason storms are named for women. Feminine power is an intimate connection with the divine. It's the ability to feel love and anger at the same time. To feel any number of things at the same time. To move mountains- maybe not physical ones but the massive emotional ones that crush the unprepared and leave many in feelings of hopelessness. To embrace feminine power is to embrace the power to ignite feelings of love and passion and devotion in anyone- just by expressing the truth in your own heart and soul. It is to understand, forgive, and love oneself knowing all vulnerabilities, weaknesses, and shortcomings.
The Law of Attraction, in this application, is the idea that the energy we give off attracts the same level energy back to us. So when we are resentful, fearful, and restrictive, we attract restrictive energy into our life- in many forms.
However, when we are living in light and love, existing completely in a space of expansiveness and joy and abundance, we attract that same expansiveness back into our lives.