Posts tagged trauma
The last of the past: Childhood Trauma, Abuse, and Neglect

I wish there had been someone who I admired to share their horror stories with me, someone to show me that I could still be successful, that I wasn't any less of a person, that I was worthy of whatever life I was willing to buckle down and work hard to create. I've wasted a lot of time feeling hopeless and disgusting and unworthy, and maybe if I'd just asked there would have been people there to tell me what I needed to hear, but I didn't feel worthy of wasting peoples' time to even ask. I thought the depth of the pain, fear, and helplessness I felt as a child was invalid because I was young. Well, it wasn't. And your feelings aren't invalid either. 

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Rape: The horror, the depression, the healing

After a while, I started to journal again. I was angry. Furious, all the time. I don't even know what I hated, but I hated it with all my heart. Myself? Him? The world? I still don't know who I was mad at during that time, but I was so angry I could hardly speak to anyone at all. When I wasn't angry, I was sobbing, when I wasn't angry or sobbing, I was asleep on a pillow wet from tears. When the tears wouldn't come anymore, I felt numb. 

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